Until 2016, my life looked quite different. On the outside, everything seemed just right: I ran my own agency focused on storytelling & imagination, had a meaningful relationship, a talented son, a rich social life, and still competed successfully in sailing regattas.
But beneath the surface, something felt increasingly off. I was mostly ‘doing’. Performing. Fulfilling expectations. In conversations, I adapted. In my work, I was professional and creative yet I missed something essential: soulfulness.
Around 2017, the carefully built house of cards collapsed. My son left for the U.S. at seventeen. Our beloved dog passed away. My then-wife became seriously ill. Eventually, our marriage ended. A long-cherished business dream fell apart. I tried to hold on tightly to what was, until that simply became impossible.
Looking back, those events were the gateway inward, into my own cocoon. Painful, confronting, healing… and the beginning of something new.
Caterpillar vs. Butterfly
Inside each of us live two inner forces. One seeks safety, clings to control, avoids discomfort. The other longs for freedom, growth, love, and expression. At Unhack Yourself, we call this the caterpillar and the butterfly.
The caterpillar lives in survival mode. It moves on autopilot, driven by old patterns and beliefs that were once necessary, but now often suffocating. It copes, but rarely feels truly free.
The butterfly is your liberated self. The part of you that lives in connection with your intuition, your inner strength, and your soul’s purpose. Reaching this state takes courage, the courage to pause and honestly face who you’ve become and who you truly are, without judgment, but with gentleness and curiosity.
Recognizing Who You’re Feeding
What helped me was learning to observe. Not fix, not force — but to feel and look honestly:
- When do I recognize the caterpillar in myself?
- When do I feel free like a butterfly?
- What do I need to truly dare to spread my wings?
It’s not a one-time choice. It’s a daily invitation.
What do you need to truly dare to spread your wings?
Flying Is Coming Home
Unhack Yourself is not a trick or method to become someone else. It’s a process of coming home to yourself — shedding what isn’t yours, layer by layer, and making space for what truly is.
I’m still on that path myself and that’s what makes it real and meaningful. Not from perfection, but from sincere connection.
The butterfly is already within you. Maybe now is the time to give it space to emerge.